However I think you're exactly right in that the travails of a startup — or working in movies and TV — isn't the right trade-off for most people. Of course you need to do what's best for you personally.

Also I don't think you're really talking about "startups" per se. Sounds like a more general question of balancing future rewards with immediate rewards. A non-startup career is no different.

Well this brings up some interesting points for me. Number one is, do I want to live long or do I want to have fun NOW? Growing up (42 yrs young now) all I heard from well meaning parents was work hard, save money, etc. But I correlated their unhappiness came from sacrificing alot of things when they were young. Yeah maybe they had some money now that they were older, but they were too old and jaded to enjoy life anymore. So I partied and didn't worry much until I saw SOME of my friends starting to make money. But even then, I've watched them sacrifice their partner and kids time for their business. Now that they are "successful" they have a partner and kids who are not so happy with them, and they use most of their "money" trying to repair the relationships that were damaged from years of neglect. It just doesn't work that way. They hold so many memories of neglect, and anger that money or time spent now just won't erase. So I would label that a failure.

The other part of this thought is, what will mean more to me, my memories of good times in the past, or the current moment I am in? If I had fun in the past, but now I'm sitting in a jail cell, or in a nursing home (same thing), I think it's the current moment, the moment we are living in, that makes life what is is. And yet, this contradicts most entreprenuerial ventures, where you are building something for the future, that you will enjoy your fruits at some FUTURE time. When (and if) that future comes, will it be everything you wanted? If you can't live with the possibility that it won't, will you take the risk to try it, or will you just stick with having fun in the present moment? pondering....

Number 2, I want to stand on the shoulder of giants, meaning I want to learn from those who came before me. I want to believe that it is possible to work hard, accomplish something, and still have time to enjoy the moment and build for a future reward time. So I don't support the concept of giving everything up in pursuit of the goal. I will work hard, but I will also play hard, and relax hard, so I have a rounded experience. And I think this will pay big dividends now and in the future. In fact, I don't see any way that you could build your business otherwise. Your business should just be a way for you to do what you want in your life, i.e. your business produces money which allows you to live the lifestyle you want. If this blog and I both survive 20 years, I'll come back to this post and comment how everything worked out :)

We started two businesses 10 years ago and I missed a lot of trips with friends in the early years. It was probably inexperience that kept me from going more than anything. Not feeling like I could be away. Fearing the other side of being on top of it every day. Unfortunately, outside of inventing a better mousetrap and living off of licensing (still my dream), sacrifice is more often than not the path to success. The good news is that it does get better in time, at least ours has and I think most would agree. The ventures are now affording the wife to stay at home with our little one, which suddenly makes it all worthwhile.

Kiddos bring clarity. At least for me.

Thanks again.

I don't think there's anything wrong with wanting to reduce your risk. It's not true that just taking big risks is always necessary.

For example, the next time around I'm joining with co-founders I like and trust, and because both they and I have had successful exits and have worked together a little, I'm optimistic about that.

Second, in this business model there's a combination of consulting and new startups. Normally I don't like mixing the two because consulting tends to take all the time and products don't get made (a separate discussion), but because we all have perspective I don't think that will be a problem, but the steady flow of income also reduces risk.

Third, now spending time at home IS more important to me, even if that means I need to spend money hiring other people to burn the midnight oil fixing a server problem on Sunday at 3am.

Having a big exit means I can afford that, so of course it's a luxury!

In short, I just rearrange the manner in which I approach problems to optimize for other things in my life which are now more important to me.

(And there's this blog which has been fun and a great learning experience!)